


Offseason Blues

by Yadirocks



Series: To Play Like a Cardinal [1]
Category: Baseball RPF
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-18
Updated: 2015-10-18
Packaged: 2018-04-26 21:39:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5021455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yadirocks/pseuds/Yadirocks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The last swing and miss was the moment it became the offseason, and that didn't really sit well with anyone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Offseason Blues

"Well, this sucks," Michael Wacha murmured as they watched the Cubs celebrate on the field. The quiet that resulted from the comment was enough of an answer. Yadi looked down at his thumb, feeling like he was going to cry. It was only a matter of time before he would be laying in a hospital bed, unable to use his hand and having nothing to do but stare at the ceiling and think about baseball. This time, there was no hope to come back before the end of the season like the year before, no second chance. It was over this time.

Adam Wainwright was staring at his ankle, his thoughts very much like Yadier's, only he blamed himself for the loss. Why did he have to get hurt so early? Why did he leave his team and then have to watch their season come to an abrupt halt despite the excellent performance they had had without him? 

Matt Holliday stared with longing eyes at the Cubs players as they celebrated, wishing that it was them out there and not the opposing team. He couldn't help but believe this was his fault. He hadn't hustled hard enough, he hadn't tried hard enough. He turned sorrowful eyes down to the dugout floor.

Carlos Martinez was on the brink of tears, his thoughts on his best friend. He had wanted to win this for Oscar so badly that when that last swing and miss had won it, he felt like he'd been stabbed in the heart. He wondered what Oscar would have done if he had been there. Maybe if Carlos had taken his place, they would've won, and Carlos wouldn't have the sick feeling in his stomach.

Tony Cruz was watching Yadier closely, knowing what the catcher was thinking about, knowing exactly what Yadier was going through. He wanted so badly to tell him that it was just a bad dream, but he knew that Yadier would scoff at him and tell him that he wished it were so. So, instead, he resulted to putting a comforting hand on Yadier's shoulder. The catcher sighed heavily, as if this small measure of comfort lifted weight from his shoulders.

Finally, they all trudged into the locker room. Yadier kept his head down, Adam kept fiddling with his glove, Matt was looking anywhere but at his teammates, and Carlos looked like he was about to break down in tears.

Mike Matheny took one look at the four and said, "I think we need to talk about what happened tonight."

Adam swallowed the lump in his throat. "There's nothing to talk about, Mike. We lost. It's as simple as that. They outplayed us. Now we spend the rest of the winter counting down the days until Spring Training along with the rest of the baseball world," he said.

Mike shook his head. "That isn't what I was going to say," Mike told them. "You boys should be proud of what you've done this year. Not many teams can pull off what we did, winning 100 games without our ace, first baseman, and left fielder. No matter what the outcome of this series had been, I was already proud of all of you."

Matt laughed bitterly. "Easy for you to say, Mike. You didn't get out four times tonight."

The rest of the team seemed to sag their shoulders in response to Matt's statement, as if they could all relate. Mike couldn't believe what he was hearing from his players, but then again, he really shouldn't have been surprised. They all loved the game, and this loss was taking its toll.

"I say we forget about it and come back next year with fresh energy, a fresh start, and take advantage of having everyone healthy. Don't let your minds dwell on this the entire offseason. Go home, relax, spend time with family. That's what the offseason is for."

Yadier stood suddenly, and Mike looked at him. Tears were falling down his cheeks. "That's what the offseason is for?" he asked, his voice small. "That isn't what my offseason will be like, Mike. You and I both know it. I'm going to spend three months at a hospital, Mike. Don't you dare try to tell me that the offseason is a time to forget, because three months in that hospital without baseball might just drive me insane."

Mike sighed, meeting his catcher's eyes. "I know," he whispered so only Yadier could hear. "But by the time you get out, baseball will almost be back, Yadi. You won't have to wait much longer."

It was silent. Then, Carlos whispered, "Baseball is our entire lives, Mike."

The entire clubhouse nodded. Mike smiled. "I'm glad that you boys care so much about it. It gives me confidence for years to come. But sometimes, you have to let baseball go, even for a little while, or Yadier is right, he will go insane laying in a hospital bed with nothing to think about but what pitches to throw to Anthony Rizzo next time."

This got a small laugh out of everyone. Yadier even let a ghost of a smile cross his features. "I'm going to be thinking about that anyway," Yadier murmured. 

Mike glanced around the room. "So let's make a deal. You guys relax until pitchers and catcher report, and then you guys can play baseball all the way through October. Deal?"

All of them smiled and nodded...except one. Carlos was staring at Oscar's locker that used to be across from his own. The OT sticker was still stuck on it. Mike was about to go over and comfort Carlos when Yadier followed his gaze and whispered, "I've got it, Mike."

Matheny released everyone, and then grabbed Yadier's arm before he could go talk to Carlos. "I want you to call me and tell me how that surgery goes," he said with a smile. "I'll come talk to you every now and then. You know, keep you from completely losing your mind."

Adam laughed. "Yadi lost his mind a long time ago, Mike."

Yadier gave him a mock glare. "Oh, yeah, I remember when it happened, too. The day I met you, that's when I lost my mind," he said, and Adam pushed him towards Carlos with a laugh. Mike smiled as he left, confident that his team would manage themselves.

Later that night, when everyone had left and the lights went out at Wrigley, Adam peeked out from the dugout. When he spotted no one, he walked up the steps and onto the field. He sat down on the infield dirt, staring up at the stars. He hoped to find a small measure of reassurance from star gazing, maybe take his mind off of what had just happened not two hours ago, but the thousands of stars in the sky only made Adam feel small.

The crunching of grass behind him made Adam smile, and he didn't even have to look beside him when they sat down. "What did the doc say?" he asked. 

A sharp intake of breath. "Exactly what I thought he would. Eight to twelve weeks of recovery."

Adam glanced at Yadier. "I'm sorry," he whispered. Yadier shook his head. "Just a part of the game," he whispered. He looked at Adam, giving him a small smile. 

It was silent for a little while as both gazed up at the night sky. About five minutes later, Adam broke the silence. "Yadier...do you ever get afraid?"

A pause. "Si. All the time."

"How come you don't ever show it?"

Yadier glanced at Adam. "When I first arrived to the States...I felt so alone, Adam. I was afraid. I didn't know English. My brothers, they were off with other teams, so I didn't get to see either of them ever. I didn't think of St. Louis as a home, because my home was in Puerto Rico. My family was in Puerto Rico, not in St. Louis. My comfort, my life, everything I knew was in Puerto Rico. I was completely terrified."

Adam waited for him to continue, but when Yadier didn't continue, he asked, "What changed?"

Yadier smiled at him. "You came along and changed it, Adam. Suddenly, I had a brother. I had a family. I looked forward to coming to St. Louis because St. Louis was where I got to see you. You were what made me not so afraid."

Adam tried to hide how much those words affected him. "I knew you loved me!" he cheered, throwing his arms around Yadier and giving him a hug. Yadier smiled, and whispered, "Si, you are my hermano. Promise me that you'll stay safe during the offseason. I don't want to come into Jupiter to find that you broke your leg or something."

Adam pulled away. "Same to you," he said, glancing down at Yadier's hand. "Listen to the doctors. Do what they say. They are there to help you, not hold you back, Yadier. They know what's best."

Yadier smirked. "I'll try."

Suddenly, spring didn't seem so far away.


End file.
